May 21, 2013
Tarzana, CA – Signalling that they want no change in local government, the residents of Los Angeles today elected a soulless union puppet as their mayor.
At a press conference, Mayor Antonio Villaraigosa welcomed the puppet to its new role in the city’s government.
“I’d like to…ahh…heh…welcome my…ahh…” said Villaraigosa, who had recently been spotted snorting cocaine with a prostitute.
“Thank you Mayor Villaraigosa, for your kind words. It’s clear to us all now that when the good people of Los Angeles have a choice between being bled dry by the United Teachers of Los Angeles and by the International Brotherhood of Electrical Workers, they can be trusted to make the right decision,” said the Mayor Elect. “And I make it my solemn promise that on my first day I will authorize raises for all city workers, and I also promise that there is no pothole that my administration will not ignore.”
The Mayor Elect is scheduled to visit Roscoe’s Chicken and Waffles tomorrow.
Via ABC News, the lone Republican in the Los Angeles mayoral race has endorsed Eric Garcetti. I’m not exactly sure why he’s doing this, as he doesn’t really have to endorse anyone, but it’s not really my problem. If he truly thinks that Eric Garcetti is the lesser of two evils, support of the Republican minority in the city might be enough to push Garcetti over the line.
Here’s the interesting part of the story, though. Both Eric Garcetti and Wendy Greul are trying to out-Republican each other, at least when they aren’t trying to win over voters in South L.A. From the story, Garcetti is quoted saying,
Because when we are able to do things like pension reform and balancing a budget, that means that we save city services, and save city jobs by the way. We are able to provide people and taxpayers with what they deserve every single time. They pay taxes to the city of Los Angeles.
Whoa. A Democrat talking about pension reform and the taxpayers? Next thing he might “[tell] supporters at UCLA [he’s] the candidate best able to shape up City Hall, starting with a 25-percent cut to the mayor’s budget.” Or he would, except, whoops, that line was about Wendy Greuel. Strange times indeed.
I don’t trust either of them. They’re both awash in union money, and unions, especially government employee unions, don’t like efficiency or budget cuts. Once one of these jokers is elected, expect Tony Villar Part Deux.
What’s good for the goose is good for the gander. Unfortunately what’s good for the goose and the gander in this case is probably bad for the voter. But I digress. Eric Garcetti’s website doesn’t have a list of his supporters, but the good news is that you can endorse him to become the Mayor of Los Angeles. That’s right, he has a link where any old schlub can endorse him. Not that he cares, but if you want to be spammed with material from the Eric Garcetti for Mayor campaign, be my guest.
It was a little harder tracking down a list of Garcetti’s supporters, but here it is. There are some surprises, like the Los Angeles League of Conservative Voters, but I’m more interested in the endorsements that prove the stereotype. So without further ado, here is the cherry picked sample of Eric Garcetti’s supporters:
National Organization for Women, California Chapter. It’s funny that in a race between a man and a woman, NOW supports the dude. This is how you know Garcetti is a Democrat, but the odd thing is that Wendy Greuel is a Democrat too. I guess NOW split their endorsements with EMILY’s List.
Shepard Fairey. I don’t know why this even matters. I guess that some time in April we’ll start seeing some hacktastic red, white and blue posters around L.A. with Garcetti’s mug on them, like the way he fellated Obama. Keep it real, Shep.
Howard Dean. This would be a much more interesting race if Howie flew out to California and toured around the city belting out his bits and pieces of insanity to rapt audiences of Democrats while the TV cameras rolled. YouTube just might explode with the sheer awesomeness.
L.A Times. This almost doesn’t deserve commentary. Almost. The Times has been trying to be a real newspaper for decades. It’s not working. It’s a fishwrap that gets beaten by USA Today on national news and barely bothers with local news, which people might actually read. Good for you, guys. Make your little endorsement.
Finally, here’s the one (actually two) that have me worried. Eric Garcetti is endorsed by United Teachers of Los Angeles and the California Federation of Teachers. More than any other corrupt and thuggish union in California, the these two are leading the charge to bankrupt the city and the state. The average pay for a high school teacher in LAUSD is $65,481, while the graduation rate is 64%. And they get benefits for the rest of their lives. And you can be a pedophile and keep your pension.
I would say that L.A. is well and truly screwed. When a city with almost four million people decide that the two best choices to run said city are a couple of special interest stooges, it tells me that the people are becoming beneficiaries of said special interests. The feeding frenzy will not be pretty, especially when the food is gone.
This one is fairly simple, because Wendy Greuel has a list of her supporters right on her website. Part of me likes this because it means that she’s not afraid to tell people who she will shill for. Of course, part of me doesn’t like it for the exact same reason. Here’s a short list with commentary:
Monica Garcia, President of California’s largest jobs program for pedophiles, aka LAUSD.
Abortion fanatic group EMILY’s List.
Bill Clinton. (Wonder what she had to do for that one.)
Teamsters Local 399, Pipefitters Local 250, United Steelworkers, Operating Engineers Local 12…Lots of unions.
Barbara Boxer, the proof that Californians shouldn’t be allowed to vote.
Wendy Greuel is probably a turkey of a candidate and it scares me a little that I might have to vote for her if Eric Garcetti turns out to be even worse. Some time in the next few days I’ll start tracking down the various special interests that are endorsing him.